Tag: Mindset

Perspective – One of the P’s in my Pod

I was talking with a friend recently about thoughts and perspectives and how and why we come to the reality of our positions. I wondered, is everyone’s mind in over-drive all the time or just mine?

My overthinking doesn’t render me in the abyss of indecision, rather it never leaves room for pure and utter silence.

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Have you ever wondered how much ground a squirrel can cover jumping from one tree’s branch to another? Or why a No. 2 Pencil is numbered and reigns supreme?

I didn’t think so.

I split hairs, connect dots, analyze angles, sharpen pencils, pull weeds in the desert and then put it all together in one cohesive anthology. It leaves me in the space of a pretty firm opinion.

People close to me are prepared for the challenge. I am neither obstinate nor a, my-way-or-the-highway kind of gal, but you can be sure I have covered all the perceived angles.

I am a good listener, I ask a lot of questions, and I can admit when I am wrong.

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I challenge other’s positions with an open mind knowing I can’t learn something new without understanding another’s perspective. It is critical to have a voice of conviction when sharing our beliefs if there is value in moving the needle one way or the other.

Nothing worse than wishy-washy.

The best orators cultivate mindsets rather than fix broken records, not just because they are firm in their conviction but because they lead and live through their example. Their passion and commitment to their belief lies beyond the words that encapsulate it.

That is a person who can push the needle.

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I would very much prefer and accept someone’s counter conviction if they themselves lived, breathed and walked in the space with it. I always say, the loudest homophobes are closet-ed gays. It’s their very vocal condemnation and projection of a belief that they clearly do not subscribe to since they hide under the pretense with enormous disdain.

Swap out any 2 things and you will see the pattern.

The loudest complainers carry the biggest shovel.

Those shining the brightest spot light are deflecting their own shadow.

Those that live in glass houses should not throw stones.

You get the idea. Pure hypocrisy.

It is okay to be on 2 different pages when our beliefs are foundational to the way we conduct ourselves.  It is not about always being on the same page or about being a goody two shoes, or living infallibly or being the brightest star, it’s about owning your words and your commitment to them.

Simply, our perspective should align with our conduct. Period. 100%.

It seems easier to pretend to be something we are not rather than just own the air and space in which we exist. There was a time in my life when this was more difficult than it is for me today, but if I had to pin-point it, I think it foundationally changed when I stopped giving a shit about what other’s thought. 

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When I let go of the frame through which I thought other’s would define me and lived more transparently, I became capable of living authentically.

When I aligned my words with my actions, life got a lot easier. Today, my not giving-a-shit attitude is not cavalier nor malicious, it simply enables a space and time to live in my words and beliefs.

It is foundational to my perspective and worldview. It is one of the P’s in my pod.

Do You Find Good Luck or Does it Find You? 7 Strategies to Discover Your Pot of Gold at the End of the Rainbow

As a kid I believed there was a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, that the elusive four leaf clover was magical and that the rabbit’s foot I wore around my neck while ski racing would deliver wins and keep me safe.

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I remember when there was something we didn’t want to do we would draw straws and whoever drew the shortest one had the unenviable responsibility to the duty. Luck, or lack of it, in the form of the straw’s length.

No strategy there.

If everything in life was arbitrary and unpredictable then there is no point in effort, persistence, confidence, positivity, or kindness. We could just sit on the couch day after day and wait for all of the good things to fall in our laps.

How miserable!

If everything in life is systematically predictable and not left to chance, is it worth changing our focus and mindsets?

Of course, I’m not talking about gambling, because that is the epitome of chance and luck for those that win big, but rather drawing positive, seemingly lucky, outcomes to ourselves.

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There are seven (wink, wink) consistent observations I see in people who seem to have all the luck in the world.

1. They are motivated as hell.

Motivation is the backbone of endless positive outcomes. If Rome wasn’t built in a day, then hard work, effort, discipline, perseverance, and motivation laid every brick. Gasping for each breath, it might be a sprint or a marathon, but motivation is what sustains us to the finish line.

2. They are quietly confident.

They do because they are. Confident people are not arrogant, they share the fortitude and focus to stay the course knowing and believing in their ability. They know hardship is part of the process. Their results are defined by who they are, not who they think they need to be.

3. They are positively positive.

If you believe like attracts like then positivity can singlehandedly transform a loss to a win. You don’t actually get the Gold medal when you didn’t even make it to the podium, rather, your perspectives on failure or not winning shape the future direction and choices. It adds another tool to the shed poised for the next venture or endeavor.

4. They focus on today not yesterday.

If yesterday’s tool is already in the shed, then we don’t need to dwell or wallow in it. We can’t look forward if we are always looking back, a path painstakingly paved with woulda, shoulda, coulda and overwhelmed by ginormous potholes waiting to swallow you whole. Focus on the now, because it is the only thing we can control and it will guide and steer the future.

5. They are tenacious and persistent.

Tenacity, grit, bravery or whatever cape you wear to enable your super powers, results from the culmination of all of the above.  The willingness to take chances, think outside of the box or simply proceed because you know in your gut you can is the place where your super powers thrive.

6. They are genuine, kind, and generous with their time.

Kindness breeds positivity and deflects negativity so none of the gestures in that regard are self-serving, they are giving and genuine. Good things may come to those who wait, but better things come to those who do good things and are kind.

7. Their conduct is worthy of emulation.

Individuality is important because it would suck if we were all mirror images of each other but emulating a worthy behavior(s) is the place where role models are born and an important step in moving toward your own pot of gold waiting patiently at the end of your rainbow.

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Luck is not happenstance; it is the outcome of an adaptable mindset. “Luck is when preparation meets opportunity,” a quote accredited to The Roman Philosopher Seneca.

Next time you say good luck to someone, know what might need to stand behind those words of encouragement.