Touching a Hot Stove Never Felt so Good

For as long as I can remember I have used the ‘hot stove’ analogy when I make significant mistakes in my life. You only touch a hot stove once because your skin bubbles, it hurts like hell, and you swear at the top of your lungs. Point made. I won’t do that again!

Conversely, there are mistakes that simmer on the back burner not hot enough to scorch our consciousness into change. They exist just outside of the realm of accountability and persist in variations of the same underlying theme. A self-fulling prophecy that lands us right back in the misery of where we began.

Recognizing that being numb to the consequences of our mistakes or failures isn’t a productive place to rest, we need to greet them with open arms and a willingness to effect change.

One small catch, how do we spot them a mile away barreling in our direction? Surely, there is a pattern in our behavior that is as clear as frickin day! “Hello, nice to see you again. Shall I trip you now or next time we meet?”

We don’t know what needs fixing until we do! Repeating the same mistake doesn’t teach us anything until it results in a different outcome. If we see mistakes as the seeds of our life lessons, then hydrating them is tantamount to overcoming them.

Many of the mistakes I made in my life brought about an abrupt change in my future behavior because of the writhing pain they created. If you touch a hot stove your next move isn’t jumping in the oven!

The one and done lessons are the easier ones to learn. Those that simmer on the back burner need our focus and attention. Many of the early choices in my life were in the name of self-protection and their misguided outcomes simmered until the pot went dry.

Time and maturity enabled me to be more objective with my approach and rationale of what self-protection should look or feel like and hurting those I loved was not it.

With time and reflection on my side, I learned those choices caused me and those around me more harm than good. Consciously choosing my path became the foundation for making productive decisions. A fork in the road doesn’t continue in the same direction for a reason. Pausing and anticipating the outcomes of going left or right became the starting point for positive outcomes.

Wrangling a definitive path that proceeds in a positive direction does not mean there won’t be bumps in the road. Ultimately, we need to believe that our actions and reactions are fully within our control. How we manage them, and their potential damage will dictate how we see our futures.

It is liberating to be accountable to the choices I make even when their outcomes don’t always work in my favor. Being accountable does not absolve me of poor decisions, rather it casts a luminous light on the outcomes. It is a proactive choice that balances the direction I take with its result. No excuses, no regrets.

We thrive or flounder in our own personal experiences and what we perceive them to represent to our benefit or detriment.  Life is not meant to be lived infallibly but without doubt needs to be lived absent blame, excuses and most importantly, regret.